One of the challenges that was given to me a few weeks ago was to think about what is triggering the anger / animosity / unstillness that I feel with being single right now. One of the things that comes first to mind is the sense of loss of a family. Sometimes I think that other people - married people - consider this "sense of loss" to equate to "despiration", which is entirely not the case at all. It is just more of a profundity of feeling than anything else.
But the other thing that I think about - a lot - is the sense of not having companionship. I feel frustration and sadness that I don't really have someone to closely share my life with. Yes, I have friends, and I even have some very close friends, but they are just that: friends. They have their own lives, their own families, their own friends and their own houses. There is a separation that has to take place - I have to go my own way and they, respectfully, have to go theirs. This is the sadness that I feel. One that says that I can only be open and vulnerable when it is scheduled and timed. When it is convenient for other people.
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